Thanks again @TerryL. I appreciate your thoughts.

I had finally had enough yesterday and called the doctor. I go in next week. I chose to fight for myself one more time. Almost as soon as I hung up, my anxiety had dropped a LOT. I'm still worried about seeing the doctor but I was going to be worried anyway, at least I'm doing something about it. Hopefully I can try meds again both for anxiety/depression and for sleep.

I will try to add more positives to my journaling. It's generally all about my feelings and thoughts, but I know some good things happen in my day and I want to acknowledge them as well. I probably have enough writing the last 2-3 weeks to be a book. I can be wordy.

Thanks again!