L has been really good with me through this. She's not being defensive or trying to put any responsibility on me. She owns what she did and has apologized for it multiple times.

I do want her to make it up to me. And I want here to feel what I feel. But I don't think either of those are realistic. How do you make-up for something like this? And how can you feel, truly feel, what another person is feeling? She is stepping up the support and is letting me vent to her all I want. She's accepting my anger and other feelings. She's taking this very seriously. I don't know what more I can ask of her. She's already doing everything I've asked for. I wish she could fulfill some of my fantasies, but that's another thing that's not realistic.