I told my T I lived her. Many years ago. Like Lonesome suggested I thought long and hard about what the response or lack of response would do to me.

I used to tell my Mum I loved her, and there was nothing in reply.

In the end I did say it to T. And we had some upset because all she said was Thank you. Looking back, that's quite a good response I guess, but it hurt at the time. I think I needed it to hurt though. It was part of the work. We talked about it, like all things.

We explored how I felt, and we explored how she felt too, to some degree. We talked about the word affection. After some clarification about what the word meant to me she said she did feel affection for me. That was a good step.

We also decided that rather than Thank You, a better response to me would be "I know, and that's ok".

I used to say it a few times. Here and there. When I felt like it.

In time that got less, as we drifted further apart in our work. As different parts came and different phases came. I still said it or wrote it every now and again though.

She never said it back, until our last session. When she abruptly stopped working with me. When I sat out on the grass and she came out to see me. After that, we hugged, and when she let go, she held my hands, looked into my eyes and said "I love you too". Those were the last words I heard, and yet I'm not sure I did hear them as such. I certainly dont remember them being spoken, but I do 100 percent know that they were, if that makes any sense.

I have felt love from her. Caring, support, kindness, interest, championing etc. Love. I have felt it and on our last session she confirmed it.

It was all a part of the process for me.