So Sorry for what you're going through! Please Do not give up! Hugs. i agree with the other wise and wonderful posters about contacting a therapist if you want to start working on this behavior of yours. i think i can relate a bit to what you're writing as i also avoid contact with Loved Ones even though i shouldn't. i think you're still in time to change this. Please do try to do something about this. i Hope things will improve really soon for you and that you will be able to get back with your girlfriend. i don't think you're a loser, just a person who's struggling and it is not your fault since you grew up like this it seems although i'd say it is your responsability now that you're adult to improve things if you want to. Sorry if that sounds harsh, i didn't mean to. i do Apologize then, Ok. Stay Safe. Be Strong. Love. Sending many Safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @Lostsoulatx, your Family, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!