A toxic friend story - this is just one of many stories I have. My question is at the bottom of the post.

This so-called friend and I have known each other for nearly 30 years. We mainly drank together at the bars whenever we saw each other, or sometimes he helped me with home projects I needed help with. He's always lent an ear whenever I've had a bad breakup - we would go enjoy a few drinks on the beach and I would cry about my broken relationships to him. This went on for years. We always enjoyed each other's company and had a lot of good laughs together. At one point in time, he would introduce me to people as his "wife".

Fast forward to today. I haven't seen very much of him since I married two years ago. He pretty much disappeared from my life, though I texted him from time to time. I knew he had a crush on me all those years, but he never made a move.

I invited him over the other night - needing comfort during my pending divorce. He's been more in touch since the separation five months ago.

He began rubbing my feet, which turned into a leg rub. I didn't mind because my legs were sore. He's given me leg rubs in the past - strictly platonically.

Well, this time, his hands ventured to my private parts near my thigh. I squirmed and pushed his hand away, saying "no, don't go there!". A few minutes later and before I knew it, he was trying to unzip my pants. I jumped away from him and froze. I didn't know how to confront him, so I excused myself to use the bathroom, then told him I needed to go to bed so he needed to go home.

I am appalled and am freaked out. In the past, there were a few times that we had become physical. There were times when we drank together and I would pass out, with him sleeping over my apartment, but in a separate bed.

I am aware of what this means - I need to cut off the friendship entirely. He is no friend of mine.

But I am disgusted and sickened by his behavior and treatment of me. Thirty years of what I considered to be a friendship of sorts, and he just wants in my pants as soon as I am getting a divorce. I knew he had feelings for me, but the total disregard for me and the disrespect is what takes me by surprise.

I will cut ties with this person. He is an alcoholic to boot and I don't need this in my life at this juncture.

I am seeing that I need far healthier people around me, and the ones who are not healthy, I must cut loose.

But it makes me feel very alone. I need new friends, it's covid, and I am 50 years old - soon to be a divorcee. UGH. I am just sick of attracting toxic people into my life. My soon to be ex husband was/is abusive and extremely toxic for me, and this man is clearly toxic. I've had many unhealthy relationships and seem to pick up all the broken strays. I know I need higher standards, but it makes me feel very alone.

I need to find healthier people, but I don't know where to start or look - everywhere I go in life, I pick up toxic types of people.

Anyone else feel that they mainly attract toxic people?