Thank you all so much for making all this effort to uplift me right now! Though I've been busy these last few weeks I have read all of these responses a number of times and value all of these different perspectives besides my own. And I actually believe they may have even guided me recently with some recent visits to the very specialists I have been fearing. After an anxiety attack I decided to finally take the plunge to get counseling and have already found the right one. He already noted that my confidence is down and he would like to help me get it back, which is a key factor in my current mental health state. And then when I saw my PCP for the first time in a few months, he really cared about me and encouraged me to put myself back out in the world instead of being paralyzed. Plus all the techs and receptionists there treated me like family. How perfect is that? And again I think all of you guys had put me in a better mindset. Thanks again @luvyrself, @MickeyCheeky, @Mountaindewedand @eskielover!