WHY AM I SO AFRAID

It'll be okay hangingon,

Be gentle with yourself and try not to go too fast. The fear is all part of the process. No one wants to go and revisit a painful past. There is a lot of dark issues that need to be looked at when we've spent our whole lives pushing it away. There is a lot of loss that has to be mourned and you'll want to avoid it at all costs. Your T will help you in the pacing and processing of it.

I always liken it to walking over hot coals. You get halfway there and your feet burn so much you run back to the start to cool them off.

But if you keep at it, the day will come when you are halfway over the coals and instead of turning back, you run ahead and realize you don't have to go back to the beginning and feel the intense pain anymore.