Quote:
Originally Posted by RoxanneToto
I can understand the guilt, though my dad was the same (I know I mentioned it on another thread, but I do get you!). If my mum had died before him, I’d have gained my independence one way or another, because there’s no way I could have lived with him if it was just us two, but I know I would still have had those guilty feelings. I’m guessing you can’t get him into care?
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The VA attempted to send some people to the house to help him out. The only requirement was to clear up his clutter. But he just refuses to cooperate. Today he told my brother and I we need to do more with helping him out. When I ask him what, his response is "You need to figure that out". Well, I'm not a mind reader and I'm not a home health care provider either. His problem is he thinks he can still order us around and of course that generates friction and arguing. All that has done is create resentment, and he equates caring with kissing his *** and doing his bidding at the expense of your own wants and happiness. Part of the problem is he uses his illness as weapon and continually says He Can't when Yes he can, he has just decided that he's not doing it anymore.