Hmm, I’m thinking if you had ‘internal rules’ for social interaction it could be more to do with masking. I’ve experienced selective mutism and have heard others describe it as wanting to talk but not being able to make any noise. Masking might be a bit more of a conscious or semi-conscious action?
As for dropping the mask, it does sound like a good opportunity for you to try and gain confidence. Most people would understand feeling like a different person after menopause has started (hormone imbalances really can have a profound impact on some people), so wouldn’t really question it.
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