Strange things are happening and I don’t understand what is going on with me. Will it ever get better? I feel like I can’t go anywhere without getting triggered and switching at the moment which is making want to give up on life. I feel utterly useless to everybody. Yes I can keep myself safe just about and get through each crisis but how much longer is this truly sustainable and when does it become too much for everyone around me? I don’t know which me is me. I just want to be normal. I don’t know how much more I can take. I don’t know if there’s any point trying to continue our work together, it feels too dangerous but how do I reverse it all? I’m scared and confused and desperately trying to hold on and I wish I could tell you all this.