I'm struggling lately/relapsing whatever you want to call it., I have been in a cycle of and it's hard to get back out of. My therapist recommended having my doctor refer me to a nutritionist. They always bring that up and I never take their advice. I went once like 6 years ago to one single appointment with one and never went back. It wasn't a bad experience or anything, I just wasn't ready to give up my ED behaviors at the time. I don't really know what to do. I'm obsessing again. I don't want to end up back in the hospital like I did a few years ago from . It scared me, honestly. The fact that my heart was beating abnormally, electrolyte imbalance. etc I didn't want to die so that scared me straight for awhile but I'm back at the old behaviors again.