My mom and I are talking now. Although I don’t think things are totally ok between us. I asked if she needed any help with anything and she originally said no. Then just now she told me I can clean out the bathtub in a bit. I feel more stable today then I did yesterday. I’m watching 2 international versions of my favorite TV show. The Australian version and the Holland version. I’m also listening to my “it’s just a story” podcast and I’m listening to one now that is over 2 hours long. Almost 2.5 hours. It burns when I go to the bathroom so I think the ultrasound kind of messed things up a bit. I’ve read that it is not quite normal to have this happen but I’ve just been ignoring it and hoping it will go away.

But basically I’m just trying to get by this weekend with distraction and doing chores.

This morning I googled a bit ftm hysterectomies. They say recovery is pretty tough. Something about air pockets that you can feel all over and they just hurt like hell. But some people grew more body hair, some people lost weight, for some people it was easier to lose weight. I didn’t see anything about weight gain. The best one I’ve read was that one guys mood swings were visibly lessened a few days after the surgery. So I’m hoping that is what is going to happen to me since I’m mainly having this surgery so I can be more stable mental health wise. And my doctor told me that will happen.

My therapist responded to an email I had sent. I just mentioned the things I wanted to discuss on Monday so I wouldn’t forget. She replied back and said we could absolutely discuss them. She said to have a nice weekend.

I wish she was that helpful and reassuring in person besides just in emails. But it’s nice that she replied back during the weekend. I do like this therapist a lot but we just don’t see eye to eye on topics that are really important for me. She has good suggestions on some things. But doesn’t give much feedback on other thing things that I need help with.