Quote:
Originally Posted by BethRags
As I see it, Md, your trans is totally in a different category from your self-medicating. I'm totally comfortable with your process of transitioning, I know several women who have transitioned to males. I do worry about your self-medicating. I'm not afraid of discussing either one with you. And yeah, when you have various hormones at high levels going on in your body it makes perfect sense that you're going to feel somewhat whacked up, until the transition is complete and things have settled down...which will happen.
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I’ve been doing better with the melatonin these last few nights. I just know I was super stable before I started my transition. I was working a part time job and picking up extra shifts when asked to work them. I was a good employee. I had zero issues with my therapist. I didn’t have any transference with her at all or feel the need to contact her outside of sessions.
I just like became this different person once I started my transition. And then when I got my first top surgery in October 2020 I felt like it almost changed my personality. Either from the pain meds or the anesthesia. I got bad post op depression that lasted for months. But I’m beyond happy with the results and I still lift up my shirt everyday to look at my chest and I can look down and I just feel like how I should be physically. But mentally, I feel like a guy, but I feel like a very mentally unstable guy.