i been off alcohol ten days, in which i have been completely manic, i managed to get off the alcohol not too bad, though their is a dependence as i had a lot of it. i went crazy this weekend, had a lot too drink friday, did stupid crazy things. barracade myself in room, was paranoid, hallucinating thought everyone wanted to kill me, most of all myself, stayed in room 26 hours.

Ended up aving a drink to cope with feeling hyper yesterday, did more crazy %#@&#!, on karaoke, being mad.
Fell down some concrete steps, shoud see the state of my face.

nobody talking to me, apart from my therapist, my parents are angry. feel like cutting.