I've been in this course now for 7 weeks and feel really worried about my teacher, in all the emotions i really wish I didn't have to see him its like I thought he understood my difficulty and I just feel really raw and now I feel like i have to explain myself. I can help the ****ed up mess I am I didn't chose to be ****ed, I don't want to be ****ed. Just feel to scared to ask him for help and I don't want to feel very vulnerable but I do. Sometimes, I really hate men like I just feel like I've been erased, I'm not like others you show me any kind of restraint I'm going to feel the worse. I can't help that I'm reserved and I eat my emotions until they kill me, I cant help that I need reassurance that I wasn't encouraged that I was the fault my mum was in Australia. I know he didn't tell me these things I don't get him I'm genuinely confused if i ask for help he gets irritable if I ask my friends in class for help he gets irritable. Holy **** what do you want from me? I wasn't gonna pull him aside and tell him because it would feel so much worse.