I hate, hate, hate relapsing. It's like dang, I'm back at square one again! Although I am back to counting the days at one, I'm not really back at square one. I've learned a few things since my last relapse. So I'm a few squares ahead of where I started last time on the board. (I tend to think of this as the old Chutes and Ladders game.) Where sometimes I have a good streak and I hit a ladder and I'm up 50 days, or 90 days, or that awesome time I went 18 months! Then sometimes I hit a chute and I'm sent back several squares. But I am not all the way back at the first square. I'm not at square one. I'm a few more squares ahead of where I started last time. And I'm not out of the game yet. I can keep playing. I can keep trying. I can make some gains. I can learn new stuff. I can put more tools in my tool kit. I'm going to hang onto hope and shoot for the stars.