a man....lol....I don`t know how many i see a day didn`t count.
Or how many of them my eyes follow.
But these days it happenes really often
(%#@&#! i need to do homework and stop wasting my time)
I noticed these days that my eyes would just follow some yong guys..LOTs of yong guys who pass by me. And being more aware of whethere they look at me......
Also that interactive design teacher looks SO attractive .....

I have to force myself to concentrate on the lesson and not on his face and his body...
And now we are doing those damn underwear adds in production and i had to check out all underwear adds on the internet....and there were thos for men....wel....

i won`t go into detail
Damn i want one time, too.!.why...but i know i will NEVER EVER have any kind of cosual sex! This type of thing is just not for me! I had that kind of crap when i was 18 a guy whom i thoguth i loved used a ****ig TOOL inside me

and when he convinced/forced me to take my shirt of... I had no clue he wanted to really do it..well i am just afraid and i need to TRUST some1 b4 i ever let him touch me. and that takes time
hmmm
And most men i met with ...and lots of otheres who see me and quite stare at me....i have all chances....I am attractive. I know people may think it`s vain to say this about yourslelf but i hear it from men, in clothing stores from my mom who always complimented me and ...well of course form the mirror
But..eh...it`s funny that i think of men mostly when i want to have a %#@&#! and i think less of romantic thoughts because i feel whole and happy inside...i don`t need my thoughts to stick endlessly to another person. I love the calm
Even when looking after a relationship, Most guys i see are not deep enough. They are superficial..and it`s hard for me to respect a superficial person

I do respect them as human being but i don`t want such a partner for life
Well i feel a little *****y that i want men just for sex

hehe
I guess in reality it`s not the case..is it?