My T allows emails, phone calls and texts (mainly for scheduling, though I have texted her when I was feeling REALLY bad and needed a more emergent response). I am highly avoidant, and I have learned over the years that when I do write her, it isn't "too much," and she appreciates what I have to say. It has been hard for me, but I can go weeks or months without emailing her, so I try to keep that in mind as well.