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MzJelloFluff said:
i'm supposed to work on "constancy"... um, how? He says it's like knowing the sun will come up each day... well, even he said that was an over-simplified example.. but it really isn't like that at all imo

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I picked or made up a "habit" or ritual that I do independent of T and then keep doing that even when T isn't there. So, it acts like a constant/sun sort of Try to think "forward" to when your T will be back instead of thinking about their not being here now/yesterday. The day after he comes back, what will you be doing at work? When is your next project due in relation to when T will be back? Incorporate it into your life with things you know aren't moving (like work or the sun).

I had a long drive to/from my T and bought those individually wrapped Life Savers and would take a handful to my car in the morning and then eat them on my trip to/from T and they'd have to last me the trip, both to T and back home (I never made it, they were gone even when I tried to ration them, I'd find myself crunching on them when I'd meant to just suck them and make them last longer, etc. :-) But when T went away, I'd still take a handful in the morning and do the to/from work with them instead, keep the day as much like "normal" and belonging to me as possible? Eating the Life Savers I would think of T and her being away and how, when she came back I'd be eating them going to/from seeing her, etc.

I've done the same with journals too. I'd write for a week and mail it to her office and thus the 6-8 weeks she'd be gone out of the country would go by and I could count them. Think up a "marker" like that (like sunrises) that exists while you see your T and while your T is on vacation both.