Nothing really to report. Vivid and insane dreams/nightmares – but feeling great beyond that. Eating taco salad for lunch and probably gonna have enough for dinner too. My mom also decided to make some fried potatoes and salmon patties. I’ve got some options for later! I have been playing some video games and relaxing these past few days. At night I have a friend once he gets off work we binge watch 3-4 episodes of a show and talk about them. I really do enjoy that before bed. It’s nice to enjoy a show and talk about it with someone. I prefer comedies and that’s what we have stuck with. We binged Superstore and now we are doing an older one called New Girl. I’ve seen a lot of episodes and really enjoyed the show, but starting from season one and following through is a journey in itself and fun!

Segueing poorly into a more serious topic: I’m nervous about starting therapy with someone new. It’s still basically a month away, but I don’t like entering into the unknown. Above all, I don’t know what preconceived notions therapy notes will leave her. I don’t necessarily agree with all diagnoses (and truth be told, I don’t even know what all of them are at the moment). Let’s not get into that, but I don’t want therapy to tailor towards something that I am not sure is an area worth putting extra emphasis on. I struggle between being an advocate in my treatment, to being a passive bystander. I don’t know where the line of appropriateness ends or begins. Sometimes I think I need to just let the professional decide, and other times I feel I should play a larger role. I think I’m gonna resolve to just letting the professional make the decisions. I’m in a emotional good place these last few months and well, there isn’t a pressure to make insane amounts of progress all at once. I think it’s best to let the professional decide what’s best.

Transitioning into a lighter topic: I think I will spend my day listening to music and maybe journaling. I don’t really like to write, but I find it helpful sometimes – especially to help me formulate ideas to express to others. I struggle with that sometimes.

Happy Monday to everyone!