T,

I thought that I had gotten the closure that I needed to move on with my life. The guilt, the anger, the fear - everything that happened during the years that I was seeing u. I was only 15 when we met. 2 years of being desperate, scared, totally on my own if it hadn't been for uou. Going to a residential treatment facility, being yanked away from u when I needed u (not by choice), having u retire before I could come back and share with u the woman I've become. We had our problems, but there was this thought in the back of my mind that I would someday come by and see you - maybe with my kids, maybe introduce u to a significant other. I feel like I worked so hard to get where I am now and u were a piece of that journey.

and now, I'm 24. after years, I decided to do therapy again. and she's wanting to revisit everything about u, and about us. I'm realizing that there were so many wounds that have never fully healed. I'm realizing that things happened between us that have scarred me in ways that I didn't even recognize. remembering everything I went through with u .... it's bringing up things inside that I thought I had moved past. I'm terrified that I'm revisiting what equates to old trauma, and this go around, I'm all by myself