It’s something I really struggle with as well. I’ve only been seeing my T for a few months and it’s something we have touched on as I said I feel guilty for not making eye contact. We talked about why I find it so hard and he reassured me there is absolutely no pressure to make eye contact but if I wanted to try it when I felt ready then he would be there ready and waiting.
A couple of times when I’ve been on the verge of dissociating he has gently said ‘if you feel like you can, just raise your eyes to look at me just to remind you that it’s me you’re with and you’re safe, but if you don’t want to do that or you can’t then that’s ok.’ I’ve managed to do it for like half a second and it has helped.
I suspect it will probably be something that we work on further down the line. At the moment I’m still working on establishing trust so it doesn’t feel safe enough yet to get in to it.