I'm trying hard to stabilize to end horrible manic/depressive cycles. I finally ended my therapy. Monday was sad because that's when therapy is but I didn't have therapy. T seemed very hesitant to end therapy. Something just doesn't feel right. I think the problem is that I think about my problems too much and just need a break from therapy. That was the plan, at least. I just got an email from a therapist asking for my phone # to talk about therapy. I'm nervous because I'd like to know who contacted this therapist. Maybe Clara.

I just can't seem to do important things without one of the others stepping in and stopping me! One thing I learned years ago is that I can't even end my own life because one of them steps in and stops it. It makes me feel like this isn't even my life. I get it. They're just caring for me. That's what they say.