Im not self diagnosing or anything I just need to get my thoughts out a bit.

I fear I might have pure-o ocd but Im also afraid these are just my natural thoughts, I fear that I am an awful and gross person and that Im just... clinging to a disorder?

I often have very graphic and intrusive sexually thoughts, usually very taboo [such as incest, pedophile and zoophilia] its not like I actively try and think about them they just sneak themselves into head at the worse times

Like Ill be watching videos on tiktok and Ill look away from certain videos and such to make sure Im not actually looking at them in a gross way and that Im just listening to the audio. Or Ill use the comments to try and quiet my thoughts

Its gotten worse lately but I dont wanna get into like, dirty details of the thoughts cause being vague like this makes me feel gross? I feel like even being open about them is bad in a way

What are your thoughts on this?