Sometimes our core beliefs about ourselves are so deeply ingrained into our psyche, that it feels threatening if someone does not understand that belief or agree with it.

I had some deeply held mistaken beliefs about myself that drove my negative self-concept, my depression, my lack of confidence for decades. Reaching a place where I could re-frame those beliefs in a more neutral, even self-forgiving light, enabled me to finally see myself as others see me. It allowed me to finally let some old baggage go rather than continuing to self-flagellate. My view of myself improved, my depression waned, and my confidence increased.

My therapists helped me see those old mistaken beliefs for the fallacies that they were. They helped me see things in a context of reality so that I could stop having those ideas drive my thoughts and emotions and actions in my present life. It didn't mean I hadn't made mistakes previously; but, it did mean that I could see the context for those errors and move past them.

It can be frightening to let go of beliefs -- even when they are inaccurate. We've based so much of our life - our choices, our beliefs, our personality even - on what we have been certain is true. Keep an open mind about this. This isn't black or white. Much of our reality of our past is somewhere in between. The damage comes when we cling to our absolute black or white thinking about our past.