As the title indicates, I've been with my BF for 16 months, and it's been a peaceful, reliable relationship. We get along well... no drama. I can count on one hand how many disagreements we've had since we've been together.

I accepted a new job in March and it's taken up quite a bit of my time. It's challenged our relationship to the point where I expressed our need to reconnect. With the pandemic, we haven't really been able to go out, but I suggested just going to a nice hotel room and staying in for a weekend... just to spend quality time together (which happens to be my love language). He agreed, but his work schedule gets in the way, and we haven't been able to make it happen.

Ok... the "fight"... if I can even call it that. We try to squeeze in seeing each other on the weekends, but occupying the same room while he watches football and I'm on my laptop doesn't constitute spending time together... (for me)

We both have dogs, and our normal routine is to bring our dogs with us to each others places so we can do overnights. He showed up at my door today without the dog (who is quite young to be left alone for long periods of time, and he's never left the dog alone at night). This raised a flag for me...

I asked where the dog was, and he said he didn't feel like walking him up and down my apartment stairs. I didn't raise my voice or anything. I just stated "That's different". It bothered me but I'm a processor, so I just got quiet...

He proceeds to say, "Are you going to have an Attitude about this," and I replied, "No, but it feels like your visit was just something you checked off your wwekend to do list. It's clear that you weren't planning on staying long. I'm disappointed..."

Not sure which nerve I hit, but he curtly asked me "Why are you trying to make this hard?" When I replied that I wasn't trying to be "pissy" and started to say "Now is not a good time..
" (I was going to finish by saying to talk about this)... He gets up, states he doesn't have to take this, and walks out!!!

What just happened? I'm so confused. I didn't chase him... not calling or texting... but huh? I guess he needs to "cool off", but our conversation wasn't heated.

Is this a control tactic? What does this mean?