Quote:
Originally Posted by lizardlady
Clover, no negative feedback here. I'm going to address your staying with this man because of your bond with the 13 year old. Doing quick math you've been in this child's life since he was a baby (toddler). You may not be biologically or legally his parent, but your emotional attachment is real. It might be stronger than some bio parents and children.
Reading your posts this guy is financially abusive. There are plenty of people who stay with an abuser in order to keep their kids. It's not a healthy situation, but some times we have to chose between the lesser of evils.
Before anyone jumps all over me, I realize Clover staying with this guy exposes her to future financial abuse. HOWEVER it sounds like she is taking steps to protect herself financially. I, for one, am not going to criticize someone who loves a child and wants to remain in his life.
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May I just say that I can find nothing in this post that I disagree with.
Thank you, liz, for that bit of math. You've made a very pertinent observation.
Here's something that confuses me. In your more recent post, Clover, you state that you expect your relationship with this man "will not survive." Does that mean you are prepared to suspend your relationship with his 13 year old son? Or do you envision continuing to support the boy, even after breaking up with his father?
Mind you, I'm not telling you to break up with this man. I would never tell you that. I'm just trying to grasp what you, yourself, see as your options. Do you see your relationship with his children as independent of you being in a relationship with him? If so, how would that be arranged in concrete terms? (As in: who would live where?) Maybe I'm missing something.
Also: did this 13 year old live for an interval of some years with his biological mother?