I've been on a path of change for the past 23 years and "why can't I change" is something I've asked myself a lot on my journey, as well. But the areas where I have grown a bit, have been so slow in coming about, that I almost believe it's had nothing at all to do with my own efforts but just happened that way, anyway.

I'd say for some people the best thing you can do is to learn how to cope better with the way you are and just keep trying to do things better and differently. That's it.