Life seems enjoyable as long as I don't feel upset over anything lost or misplaced or something bad happening at the last minute. I feel like I'm treated like I am a bad fixation waiting to happen that would ruin everything. It has made me kind of wish I had turned out different. It makes me feel all around crappy when I have times like that. I had trouble with this over the years and as a result, I was a real target resentment.