I think I fully realised today that in thinking of working with Temp T all I doing is trying to replace the lost connection, the lost feelings, the lost relationship that I had with Ex T. God I want that back so badly. So badly. It feels like my heart has been taken and I want it back. I feel empty and lost without her. It feels like I will never be the same again. I simply cannot imagine my life without her in it, and I don't know how to move forwards like this. Maybe I am not in the right place to do this work with Teenage One. Maybe Temp T is what I need right now. Maybe I need that safety, that support, that warmth and caring just to be able to get back on my feet after losing Ex T in this way. I am certainly not over it, and I don't know how to get over it.