I didn’t think of you today besides your couch because of that one thread I posted in earlier. I didn’t mention you to my mom either. Honestly you being the same age as me made me put up some boundaries and sometimes I just get a bit confused about how I feel about you and how I want you to feel towards me. I actually think you may be a few months younger since it’s November and my birthday is in February. Although I could be wrong and we could have close birthdays.

I guess I’m just confused and slightly weirded out. I’m not used to people my own age unless they are coworkers and even then I don’t really care for them. Also I’m wondering if you noticed that I got a bit standoffish when you told me we were the same age. Because I did. And I don’t know if I did a good job at hiding it or not. Because I noticed that you got a bit weird too when you mentioned the age thing.

I have not had any tea that came from a box in days. I do not feel like associating any type of tea with therapy the way I used to. I want some tea to help me sleep but that’s it.

My trans affirming medical doctor will most likely be raising my T dose next year and I hope my sex drive doesn’t go insane because that may affect our client therapist relationship the way it did with my transference therapist and I don’t want to be attracted to you. But it’s like we don’t choose who we’re attracted to.