@will19. I really get how you feel, so much. I left a hobby I used to love and did for a long time. I miss it too. I don't want to go back because it changed or I changed and it's no longer healthy for me. I don't have a replacement. I planned to work on a novel, my poetry book, and so on. But I have no motivation. I miss the social aspect of that hobby. I found communities on FB, but it's not the same and I can't do the same things that I was so. Eh. Something new should come up eventually. You might find a new hobby or something else that is very fulfilling. I wish I had more advice on that but I'm in the same position so I just try to think positively.

@Yaowen. I'm actually not on an anti-depressant. I'm going to talk to my therapist about it then possibly pursue one. Because I have bipolar disorder. I never really experience mania, but I get severely depressed frequently. I've also been through a lot of trauma so it might be because of that. But I feel an anti-depressant might still be helpful. Trauma does change your brain after all, so maybe the way my brain is now, I need an anti-depressant whereas before I didn't.

I was reflecting on this most of the day and I still don't have any insights or answers. I'm just tired of feeling this way. I was doing really well for about 10 days, I don't know what happened. I had a really bad day yesterday. Everything unraveled and fell apart. That's usually what happens whenever I start to do better. I hope one day I can get to a point where I just can stay better and balanced instead of falling back into the black hole.