I'm sorry BB.. It must be really hard to be in that state of mind. I don't think you're on the right meds. I get this way sometimes - I'm a perfectionist but I know where the line is - I play mental tricks on myself such as staring at objects in their places, saying "I'm content with this - It's the best I can do" - Then a distraction. It's basically what you're doing I think.

In dissociation, I can't keep track of the objects so I stare at them and I don't even know what they are for or what their functions are. But olanzepine helped with that to prevent it from happening.

I had DP/DR dissociation 3-4 times this year which is nothing compared to last year. Hugs!