I am so proud of you for receiving help despite all the hurtful things your mother is doing.

My mother hates the fact I am in counseling. Sometimes it strikes fear into a person who has tried for years to silence their children. "What are they saying, what are they saying about *me*, and what is that counselor going to say about it?"

Their efforts at keeping you silent have gotten a lot harder now that you have found a trained professional to help you uncover what happened in your past and is happening in the present.

I believe you should talk about these issues with your mother, to your therapist. They have come across these issues before with other clients, no doubt. What she is doing is throwing you into chaos and it needs addressed so that she will not have that power over you. She's had it long enough and she's afraid to let go of it!

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More than anything I just want her to be my mom, just once. Gosh,.....what did I do to make her be so insensitive? What did I do to make her hate me? Am I really that stupid? Why cant she just be my mom....support me just once in my life? Am I asking too much....sometimes I just don't know how to do this.....

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Tell this to your therapist.

Best of luck on your journey. Take care of you.