I was pangry today, and triggered.

I felt really defeated, lost, embarrassed, hurt, confused, and paranoid.

I felt like no one really cared, and like the world wants me gone.

I also had many micro flashbacks happen today, and I dissociated.

Even my system was in chaos earlier today.

I think we misinterpreted some things online, so we had to go away from the computer for a while. It would have been helpful to see more kinder replies, or kinder explanations, but it's hard these days to figure out what people mean or whose polarized political side they are on and whether or not that would mean more attacks and rejections of me and my alters.

Anger, for me, comes in many forms. Sometimes I get the depressed-angry feelings. Sometimes I get the pandemic-related "pangry" feelings. Sometimes I get the justified-angry feelings. And sometimes I just cry inside (not outside) because anger feelings hurt.