SprinkL3, I totally understand how you feel about your situation. My parents are not rich but worked hard to earn their money although we are still not rich.

As for braces, I never had them either. It's not part of my parents' culture to pay for braces. My teeth are crooked on the bottom but this has not stopped me. I also don't wear brand-name clothes. I wear second-hand clothes from what they call recycle shops here.

I am poor but strive to maintain my health and appearance. I was homeless once also and know the meaning of down and out. I am not privileged but did work hard as an undergrad. I became sick in medical school and this was my downfall. I struggled to do my best despite my weight gain and poor appearance. I experienced much racism and discrimination because of my looks and ill health. People walked all over me since I looked bad and felt bad.

Now, I am still poor and am working to make ends meet. I live within my means. I don't travel or party. I don't have vices that take a toll on my looks except that I'm slightly overweight and need to lose about 20 pounds. Honestly, I am not superficial but the world is. I really don't care about others' looks too much but do worry about mine. People do judge you by how you look especially if you don't know them.

My father works because he came from poverty and had absolutely nothing. He used to pick grapes as a laborer in California and worked his way up in life by being smart about his life. He owns his own business now since he and my mother sacrificed everything to earn a living. He only has a seventh-grade education. But, he worked damn hard. He also never had a father figure and was treated really badly by his maternal family for being born without a father figure. He never had shoes and never went to the dentist. He ate potatoes for most of his life. He has come a long way since then but he works, I know, because he does not want to be in poverty anymore.

I understand that some people judge you by the clothes that you wear or your physical appearance. But, I want you to understand that your health is in your hands. You can do something about it by taking care of yourself. I know it is hard when life is so difficult. But, your health is under your control. I would stop blaming others and outside circumstances for neglecting your health. You don't have to wear brand-name clothes to look good either. I don't. I want to feel better though and know I must lose some more weight. I am not skinny but chubby. This is not good either.

Poverty and ill health are a bad combination. This path you are taking will lead to more misery. I urge you to take your health seriously by taking care of yourself. I also have acne scars but wear makeup to soften them. I also have rosacea and am red as a beet without makeup. I do admit I am blessed for what I have although it is not much. I spend my money on looking good by wearing makeup and lotions. But, I don't have that much money to spend so am just eking by somehow.

So, I would make the best out of your situation by trying to figure out what you can do within your means to take care of yourself. You used to smoke cigarettes too, I understand. I never had such a bad habit. Also, I don't drink alcohol. So, my only vice is eating sweets. I am not perfect but strive to make the most out of my situation. As I said before, I was disabled about four years ago and could not take care of myself. So, if you have similar issues of not being able to take care of yourself, you must not live by yourself if you can help it. I lived with my family during this time and realized if I don't help myself I was going down the drain. Thus, I am compliant with my medication now. I also try not to gain too much weight anymore although I am overweight still. I am doing better because I know how it is like to not take care of myself and be down and out.

I know life is hard for you as it is for me. But, you must find the light in your life. Please find a way to feel good about yourself somehow. I know that poverty and lack of self-care can make you look unappealing to others. So, at least try to find some ways to feel good in life. It could be just walking around or exercising. It could be eating healthier. I don't know what makes you happy. For me, it is being healthy and looking my best.

Racism, ageism, and sexism will always be around. Nothing will change. But, we can change ourselves and feel better about ourselves. Please don't let bad people define your outlook on life. Please try to find something that makes you happy. I am happy now because I am doing what I like and am doing well. I am not rich nor that attractive. I am healthier now and feel good about it. It is not too late to change your outlook on life. I am older than you. I was homeless about eight years ago. I again was disabled about four years ago. It is never too late to change and make a better life for yourself. Please take the first step by taking care of yourself and by finding happiness from within.