I felt so stressed yesterday. Just go-go-go. How much of that is because I had a lot of things to do vs. working myself up into a state? I am trying to stay calm today but am already feeling stressed.

These are my stressors.

1. The house is a mess. Lots of dirty dishes. I can only fit so many in the dish rack so when I start to get behind, it snow balls. Maybe I need to start drying them with a towel? That seems germ spready.
2. Revisions for things 1 and 2 are due next week. I have not worked on either for a couple of days. I also have new information for thing 3 that I need to add before I forget it.

3. I re-started a renovation project I stopped working on last year. I am SO CLOSE to finishing but it is the kind of thing where I can only do a little bit of work each day because it's physically challenging. If I worked consistently, I could wrap it up in a week. The room is a disaster until this is done.

4. I have a lot of phone calls and emails to return and feel like I have lost track of some.
5. I have some overdue library books I haven't read. I would like to bring these back today.

6. I am somehow double booking meetings and feel I have lost track of these as well. I showed up at one on the wrong day. This isn't really like me.
7. I really need an hour of exercise a day to keep my blood sugar under control but it is hard to fit that in.

8. The job situation. I need a more reliable source of income. I do not want to go back to my old career. I am close to breaking into a new one but it takes time and money.
9. My husband is driving me crazy. He would not pack his lunch today. If I didn't do it, he would go out to eat again. He also just constantly talks through every single thing he does with me. He reads me things from the internet I have zero interest in. He explains projects he is working on in minute detail that I don't even understand. I am an unwilling audience. He is going to be working from home again shortly and I feel an overwhelming sense of despair over this.


I'm not even sure listing all this makes me feel better. Maybe it's just another way to ruminate. I was hoping if I got it all down on paper, I could forget it. Instead, I look at the list and think 'oh, well, I will just take care of all of this today and then I will feel better.' That's not really possible. I can't do it all in a day.


Right now I am going to go out and run some errands. When I get back, I will work on revisions. Later today I will wash some dishes and start another cooking project. At some point I will need to work on my renovation project but I am dreading that.