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IMO forgiveness is always about the forgiver. Yes the subject or cause of the pain is related to someones words or actions but to forgive is giving yourself permission to heal and move forward. Its cathartic. Its freeing. I only have this view point because of my own experiences getting sober and dealing/accepting/healing from my past trauma. I think its sort of inaccurate to look at forgiveness as the hurt, injured or traumatized person being responsible to do the "forgiving" for all the horrible mistakes, hurtful actions and abuse . I do not believe that is the job of the forgiver. The forgiver always has a choice-To allow the past abuses to rule the present and impact your quality of life and relationships; and additionally bear the burden of righting that wrong by bestowing forgiveness and understanding.
F*** that sh**. Seriously. The forgiver can forgive to help THEMSELVES heal. It is not meant to clear the conscience of a abuser or to absolve them of past wrongs.
__________________
"I carried a watermelon?"
President of the no F's given society.
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