@SmilesGirl, the thing is, this man is causing HARM to you, your family relationships and your life. He separated you from your family, he has gotten you fired, he has threatened to blackmail you, and he is very controlling of you. When someone causes you harm, you have to let them go. There has to be limits and lines drawn around what you will accept and not accept. And what he has been doing to you is unacceptable behavior in a loving, stable and healthy relationship. This relationship is extremely toxic and unhealthy. Statistically speaking, abuse only worsens and escalates over time, especially after marriage. Once they know they "have" you more fully, abusers become far more controlling and abusive. And physical abuse is always preceded by emotional and verbal abuse. This man has yelled at you as well - to the point of tears. That is unacceptable behavior.

I know you say you love him very much and that you cannot imagine life without him, but how much more damage will you allow him to do to you before you've reached your limit? You have to realize and understand that you are being severely abused. You have to try and remove your love for him from the equation for a minute and look at him far more objectively. Is this behavior you would allow for your sister, daughter or best girlfriend? What would you say to any of them if you saw someone you loved being treated the same way?

When you are inwardly afraid of your partner's anger and of what he may do when he's angry, it should be a signal to you and a sign that something is drastically WRONG. And there is something drastically wrong.

Marriage is an investment in someone and an investment in your future with that person - and you have to not only love the person, but you have to feel safe, secure and stable with them too.

So, bottom line: I would secretly make a plan to leave and whatever you do, do NOT let him know. Get the support of your friends and family, call a women's abuse hotline to obtain support and advice on how to safely leave him. Start making an exit plan now. Whatever you do, don't move to Boston to be near him. Stay where you are. And get a support system around you so that you can find the courage and strength to leave him. It WILL take strength and fortitude - but your sense of safety and self respect must come first. This man will drag you through absolute HELL otherwise if you do not leave him now. Think about it - is that TRULY the kind of future you want for yourself? Because that's what you're in for with this most abusive man.

PLEASE reconsider and start making exit plans.