How can you say you failed when he is the one flirting with other women? And yes, you are clearly taking your vows seriously - is he?

As for him making decisions with concern for you first, I find that hard to believe. If he were concerned about you he would not inspire mistrust.

Anyway, you keep justifying his 'good' behaviour so, unlike what you wrote in your very first post, it seems you *do* know what to do and which direction to take (i.e. stick with him, defend his behaviour). If for 5 years he was unable to inspire trust, it is unlikely that he would change but at the end of the day, it is your life and your decision.