Can someone please explain this. I find it hard to get my head around..

If I'm married and I cheat then my husband would be very upset and my actions would have caused those feelings. Therefore I'm responsible.

If I make plans with a friend then stand them up they might feel disappointed. My fault as my actions caused those feelings.

If I shout at someone they might feel scared or angry, my actions caused those feelings.

Etc... Etc..

So how does 'we are not responsible for the feelings of others' work?!