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Wow, you are the first bipolar off meds I've met. At least the first one who wasn't Jesus living under a bridge.

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Okay, that one got me roaring with laughter. Ain't it the truth tho'?

The bottom line, I think, is we live a controlled lifestyle. By analyzing what works and what doesn't work, what triggers and what doesn't, people we can be with and people we can't....we're able to have some limited control over the severity of the cycles. We seem to have (most of the time), the self-control to modify our lives in whatever ways we deem necessary to live med free with this "illness". Meds, for me, are a chemical induced prison that just made life not worth living. Example: you had mentioned earlier about the lack of desire for sex on meds. Well, who could? The slumber, lack of energy. The total detachment from ones emotions. Unable to get ones body to respond to anything, including the touch of a loved one. Inability to imagine or fantasize. And don't get me started on the nausea, constipation, trembling, dry mouth...and other things even worse than those just listed that I'll spare putting in writing, but some of you will know what I mean! Physical intimacy is waaaaay too important to be taken away by pills!?!? And this is just the sexual aspect. What about creativity? Or appetite? I NEED to taste my frickin' food! How 'bout experiencing basic human emotion such as joy, contentment, and yes I dare say anger, and I totally lost my sense of humor!! I don't think so! Can't live without that
I realize everyone's body chemisty is different and we all respond differently to the same medication, so I emphasize this was just MY experience with a pluthra of different meds tried and failed.
I think you'll agree with me Sqrl, it ain't easy! But DAMN, it's worth it!
TgrsPurr.