@Hexagon, welcome to the Bipolar forum and thanks for sharing some of your story. I'm sorry you had an event that triggered your illness. Most of us had some major trigger that seemed to kickoff ours. I was only 15 years old when mine took off. I'm over 50 now. It has been a lifelong challenge, but we can all experience many good times, despite. Do concentrate on your wellness.

It appears that you do have some coping skills/tools you use. I love my sound machine, too, and use it when I can't sleep or am anxious. Like you, the "meadow" mode is a favorite. So is "rainfall", "fireplace", and "brook". Summer meadow insects were much louder in my native New Jersey than in Czech Republic, for some reason.

I rather prefer nights when I don't recall dreams. I wake up better rested.

Many here are taking, or have taken, the medications you mentioned. Olanzapine has the same generic name in the US. The Eygenyl Retard is called "sodium valproate" (US brand Depakote), as I know it. I don't think the benzo Zopiclone is used in the US. I know there are these naming differences, as I now live in Czech Republic. In any case, I have also taken benzos, and once also took the olanzapine and sodium valproate. One of the benzos I took in the US is not prescribed in Czech Republic.

I hope you stay on here, if you want. Also, check out the "Bipolar Check in" thread to get to know others.