Urges are bad today. They are coming in waves. Like I'll be fine. Then I'm not fine. Then I'm fine. Then I'm not fine. I work in an office that is attached to a manufacturing plant. I am trying to stay in my office and not go out to the manufacturing plant because if I did I might find something I could use to hurt myself and I don't trust myself to leave it alone. I feel like a junkie right now. Needing a fix. UGH. You think after three months it would get better. Not worse.