Quote:
Originally Posted by eskielover
Best thing you can do is observe through a logical lense & just see where it goes. I had 2 years of intense DBT therapy before the skill set actually became a natural part of my life. It takes time but for me it was the best therapy (with the best psychologist) I ever had. Definitely valuable skills to learn & become the way to function
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Yes this is what I’m thinking—it will take a lot of time to become natural and a lot of discipline and effort in the meantime.
He said I’ll have to learn to trust him, or relearn, which didn’t sound right to me. I am trusting of my family to a fault (I now fully realize). I need to learn to trust myself. He would be more honest saying he has to make permanent different choices and have a new code of conduct so he can be trustworthy and reliable not just when he feels like it but always. even when he isn’t outright lying, he is often lying to himself.
I said during counseling that he has done a lot of damage that will take time to repair me that I pretty much ignored him for the last year and that he stop being mean first step. He wasn’t able to own being mean, or seemed shocked by it.