I don't get these intense relationships with my T's. I'm kinda like, hey, if I don't feel like I'm making "progress" or things are at a standstill or we disagree on fundamental issues--this is my "employee" basically & if I don't think I'm getting my money's worth, I'll go elsewhere.

I now have a phone interview (I've drafted on Word) I do with a potential T before I do an intake appt. Why waste her (I only see females) & my time & my money if we don't have the fundamentals in alignment? So far, no T has refused to do a 10-min. phone interview. I mean, I'm polite & all, but I don't want to get in there & after 3 sessions find out I'm with a Tom Cruise clone who thinks medications "blunt" my feelings & thus thwart therapy. Geeze, I'm sorry, but I'm bipolar 1 & if she saw me off meds she would realize I wouldn't even be able to do an ounce of therapy--I'd spend the whole time crying (did that for many years).

So through the interview process I feel comfortable with the T I'm with, but I don't feel all this transference or intense emotions towards my T. If I disagree with what she said, I just tell her.

So far she has given me some good suggestions & resources (have an appt. for an intake for a DBT group). With her help my communication with my husband has improved tremendously. I was very closed off & she gave me practice in how to express myself.

I just say don't settle for anyone who isn't meeting your needs, no matter if they are a Ph.D or M.D. Take responsibility for your healing in partnership with your providers.--Suzy