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Old Dec 27, 2021, 03:22 PM
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AzulOscuro AzulOscuro is offline
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Member Since: Nov 2014
Location: Spain ( the land of flowers and gladness, lol!)
Posts: 3,837
Quote:
Originally Posted by sarahsweets View Post


Oh gosh I didn’t mean you should change the thread, I just mean that people are quick not you to throw that term around especially when they are trying to gaslight you into not sharing your experience.

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I understand now what you meant.
Anyway, I thought I wasn’t very lucky in the expression I used in the thread. It sounded as if I was putting the blame on a person who struggles and if I were being judgemental on a mechanism that is unconscious.

Answering your last message. Me too. I feel pretty bothered when a person try to get control over another one by putting him/herself in the victim control when it’s in the end just the other way around.

It seems to me, but this is a personal feeling, that it’s more likely that the person who is target of coercive control are those who tend to have a lower self-esteem and are open to self-criticism.

Being in control or your needs and feeling strong is very helpful to put limits when someone is trying to get control on you. And for many people is not easy.
For example, it’s now that I got to have a healthy self-esteem and I’m very aware of up to which point I’m ready to take in.
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Social Anxiety and Depression. Cluster C traits.
Trying to improve my English. My apologies for errors and mistakes in advance.

Mankind is complex: Make deserts blossom and lakes die. ( GIL SCOTT-HERSON)
Thanks for this!
sarahsweets