I had an online T appointment that went really well today. My T got to see my new haircut. I cut my own hair. We both laughed about how we both have wavy hair, so we can get away with hair not properly cut. My hair goes "poof" and springs up when I cut it. It's wavy and curly, so it went from the middle of my back (tangled and all) to now above my shoulders and just under my chin. It looks like the shape of a mushroom top, LOL. But it's straight enough, and I like it. I'm proud of cutting my own hair. It's been over 2 years since I've had it cut professionally. I'm glad I learned to cut it on my own. I color my hair from the kit sold in stores and delivered through the mail - the cheap L'Oreal brand.

I feel better about all my triggers, though we didn't really discuss that. My alters were upset, but they found comfort in the T's words today. We all feel really safe now, and we're focusing on safety. We're not ready for trauma processing yet, but my T said we should try to work together and do it in bits and pieces, but only when we are ready. Some alters are, but not all of us are. I, the main person, am not ready yet. (I have dissociative identity disorder, for those who are unfamiliar with what I'm saying).

Anyways, I'm still anxious, but I'm doing better. I'm still dealing with OCD stuff, but I'm also doing better. I ordered door delivery for later tonight - in about 3.5 hours, give or take. I'm hoping that goes smoothly. I have trash to dump in the indoor trash chute (if it is working and not overly stuffed), and I am hoping that there aren't many neighbors roaming the hallways unmasked, like they usually are, so that I can safely go in my double-mask and goggled and gloved and fully clothed/covered PPE attire to my storage to put away all the boxes and bins that I was able to unpack these past few days. I also need to ride the elevator twice to get mail and packages, as well as to dump recycling outside (and maybe trash, too, if the trash chutes are inoperable). I'm hoping I can do all that, clean and disinfect my perishables before putting them away, and then strip, wash hands, wash glasses, wash hands again, and then shower and get into clean clothes and then hide out in my bedroom behind the closed doors, where the air is the safest. There's always air that comes in from the positive-air-pressured hallways, where unmasked neighbors breathe and sometimes hang out unmasked. So I worry about the virus entering my home that way. I am super careful about spending about 3 hours in my bedroom after a shower, since both my bedroom and the shower doors remain closed whenever I have to open my front door for deliveries and all. My 7 air purifiers also help to purify the air that comes in from shared hallway air. So far, I've been good not to contract anything. I don't wear a mask inside my apartment, but I take precautions like spending time in my bedroom with the doors closed until enough time has passed before any aerosolized virus has settled to surfaces, where they can remain active for another few hours to days, but I'm good about cleaning high-contact areas after 3 hours of me returning from the outside have passed. I've got it down to literally a science. I might still get the virus, but it will be a mild dose - not the full-blown massive dosages people get when hanging in crowds or going unmasked all the time. Yuck!