I'm struggling with nightmares and feeling really down about not being able to do grad school. All of my peers are already into their careers, many of them with doctoral degrees, professional degrees, or Master's degrees and at the start of their careers. I'm not so fortunate, even though I surpassed many of them with straight-A grades in college and have formed study groups with them. I feel like I'm so behind.

I woke up thinking it was about 5 a.m. It was around 5 p.m. instead. The sunlight is gone at both hours, so it was easy for me to confuse - esp. since I don't have a window at all in my strange apartment's bedroom.

I feel like I've lost a day, but on a positive note, I did finally get some sleep. I slept all day, and now I can find some energy to do some house chores.

I wish that I weren't disabled or mentally ill.