If the relationship is between lawyers, maybe not. They tend to argue a lot to keep their wits about them. If the relationship is imbalanced, where one person is controlling and the other is giving or receiving too much, then yes, perhaps it is a form of gaslighting when the person has already made up their mind on who you are in the relationship and how they should treat you, thus making any changes or boundary setting you do be something out of your character (in their mind), which would then spark a counterargument on your part, and then start the gaslighting process, if they don't get their way. But if they are constantly pointing out your flaws, then they might not be gaslighting and instead just be toxic. That's not helpful at all to you, regardless of what "flaws" you may need to work on. I used to have former friends who picked on my flaws all the time, and I just could not live up to their standards as a friend. I let go of such toxic or unfit relationships because it wasn't going to help me; instead, it actually hindered me.

The term "gaslighting" is being thrown around more and more these days, due to its use in political arenas. So, it's important to perhaps reframe what is going on through examples and details, as opposed to labels and generalizations.